What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

True - how I loved my mum!

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

What is your best forbidden sex story that felt so right?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What! how could you do that?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Why do most people care so much about what others think? Are they afraid of society norms?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

When North Koreans visit other countries for the Olympics, what stops some of them fleeing away into that host country?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Do you know what she said mum?

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What do you mean son?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

Are vampires real?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.